"Neon Night (End of the Day)"

This one is called “Neon Night (End of the Day)”. Tell me what you think!

Intro:
It’s the end of the day, with the tortured sun
Having made his daily trip around the Earth
Now He burns away at the edge of sight,
That’s when the lighters come out and cigarettes ignite.
The kerosene burns bright
To match the neon night
And the scene is hardly done
It waves goodbye to the tortured sun.

Chorus 1:
It says, “Don’t Resist the Poison!”, as you can tell
The sun tried, but it fell
Into a prison; a twelve-hour cell
Just to make room for a neon Hell.

Verse 1:
Like McConaughey, I’m dazed and confused.
The smokes cleared, but who are you?
A ghost of a friend whose end came from them and
Despite good intentions he had to submit.
Now I find myself hating myself for waiting
To head down that corridor after you.

Verse 2:
I should have known.
I should have tried.
In hindsight I’m biased to think that I might just
Have lost you all by myself, without any help from another.
You said “No worries don’t bother.
I’m no lost cause, cuz I’m not lost at all!
So let’s stop the pretenses, go on and pick up a pencil,
Take out some paper, and write this one down”

Chorus 2:
You said, “You cannot resist the Poison!”, as you can tell
The sun tried, but it fell
Into a prison; a twelve-hour cell
Just to make room for a neon Hell.

Verse 3:
Like Caesar, I feel betrayed.
Take this knife out my back;
Feels like I just got punched by Cassius Clay.
With my dying breathe I say “Eh Tu Brute?”
Because those neon lights pulled you away,
But unlike the sun I don’t know if you will return.

Verse 4:
And I don’t care if you don’t want me,
I’m still gonna follow you around the Earth.
So long as I’m there, the sun will be too,
And the neon lights won’t shine quite as bright.
I don’t care if you’re poisoned, I’ll suck out the venom!
Now take out pen and paper, and curb your indifference.
I won’t let you forget me, so write that one down.

You write way better than i

Thanks! but you don't give yourself credit, it will come the more you work at it. Most of my stuff still is somewhat cliche.

This is definitely good man. What style of music would you play with these lyrics?

I have different ways I could play it, but in my head i prefer the version that sounds more like Rise Against and Sum 41 if you've ever heard of them.